After 2 years of harboring resentment for being towed out of my own parking spot by University Parking Enforcement (UPE), I finally took a bit of revenge. Yes, it was sweet. But like all victims who hope to revel in their successfully-executed revenge plots, I don't feel any better after having done it. Hopefully, you might get some enjoyment from reading about it.
I fought the $150 ticket. I filled out all the necessary paper work and even acquired a signed letter from my apartment manager vindicating me. No go. Provo City government protects its towing companies. They know that students come and go, but UPE, Express Towing, and the like are here to stay. (At the time, I was blind with rage and frustration! I even entertained possible conspiracy theories involving Provo city officials receiving a portion of the profits from this type of predatory towing. I couldn't believe how the city could allow something like that?!)
When I paid the fee, they released my car to me. On our way to the lot, I demanded that one of the employees witness that my parking sticker was there, but they wouldn't. I demanded to see the video recording that they are required to make of my car before towing it, but they wouldn't. They seemed to have all the power, with no one to challenge their authority.
Ever since then, I've had a chip on my shoulder regarding Provo parking politics. Some days it's so bad that I give local tow trucks a sarcastically-friendly honk. (I know, I’m evil.) They must get honked at a lot because they usually flip me off in return.
There are two lessons from this tragedy:
A devious plot stirred in my mind. I parked next to the truck and quickly noted his license plate and telephone number on the side of his door. When I got inside I made a phone call that went something like this:
And then he was gone less than a minute later.
"Thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges" ~William Shakespeare
Part I: The Backstory
Two summers ago, my car was towed out of my private, reserved parking spot on my first night in the lot because my sticker wasn't adhered to the back windshield. It was visible; it was just place on the back, passenger-side speaker because the apartment welcome packet didn't clearly explained where the sticker ought to be placed. Not wanting to get towed for misplacement the sticker (I had heard stories about how particular Provo parking enforcement can be), I decided to wait until the next day to find out for sure from the office. …Wrong choice.I fought the $150 ticket. I filled out all the necessary paper work and even acquired a signed letter from my apartment manager vindicating me. No go. Provo City government protects its towing companies. They know that students come and go, but UPE, Express Towing, and the like are here to stay. (At the time, I was blind with rage and frustration! I even entertained possible conspiracy theories involving Provo city officials receiving a portion of the profits from this type of predatory towing. I couldn't believe how the city could allow something like that?!)
When I paid the fee, they released my car to me. On our way to the lot, I demanded that one of the employees witness that my parking sticker was there, but they wouldn't. I demanded to see the video recording that they are required to make of my car before towing it, but they wouldn't. They seemed to have all the power, with no one to challenge their authority.
Ever since then, I've had a chip on my shoulder regarding Provo parking politics. Some days it's so bad that I give local tow trucks a sarcastically-friendly honk. (I know, I’m evil.) They must get honked at a lot because they usually flip me off in return.
There are two lessons from this tragedy:
- Provo Parking Enforcement can't be reasoned with.
- When you get your parking sticker, immediately place it anywhere on your back windshield. Apparently they don't care where it's positioned.
Part II: Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Cold
I was on my way home from the gym when I discovered that the only available parking spot at my apartment complex was next to this big hulking truck that was so wide, it tumbled over into the adjacent parking spots. Grrrrrr. I hate that. Then I saw that this was no ordinary rig. It was a tow truck!A devious plot stirred in my mind. I parked next to the truck and quickly noted his license plate and telephone number on the side of his door. When I got inside I made a phone call that went something like this:
Tow Guy: [Hick accent] Towing dispatch, how may I help you?
Me: Hi, and who is this?
Tow Guy: This is Ryan from Express Towing.
Me: Yeah, hey Ryan, I'm trying to find a parking spot at Carriage Cove and I noticed a truck without a sticker awkwardly parked so that it is taking up more than one stall.
Tow Guy: Well, le'me take a look. I'm actually at Carriage Cove right now. Where is this truck you say?
Me: [Peeking out my bedroom window] It's on the North side of the lot near the garbage bin.
Tow Guy: oRLY? [Skeptical]
Me: Yeah, the UT license plate number is 971 - WGW.
Tow Guy: Um. That's my truck.
Me: Karma bites, doesn't it Ryan? It's 11:34pm. Happy April Fools Day.
Toy Guy: Very funny.
Me: But seriously, Ryan. Who watches the watchmen? Who do I call when I can't find justice in my own parking lot? Do you have the non-emergency number for the Provo police?
Tow Guy: 801.852.6211
Me: Mm-kay… That's all I've got, Ryan. You have a good night.
Tow Guy: You too.
And then he was gone less than a minute later.
"Thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges" ~William Shakespeare
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| Karma comes back around. |
That is an awesome story!!! ha ha ha. I think I'd feel better after doing that. So now the question is, did you call the non-emergency line for the police? What's the rest of the story?
ReplyDeleteOkay, Bryan that was AWESOME!! The best!
ReplyDelete