Tuesdays with Muerte

If I were literally a Dungeons and Dragons character, I think I'd have the following stats: Lawful Good Human Cleric (4th Level) Ability Scores: Strength- 15 Dexterity- 18 Constitution- 17 Intelligence- 16 Wisdom- 15 Charisma- 16 Alignment: Lawful Good A lawful good character acts as a good person is expected or required to act. He combines a commitment to oppose evil with the discipline to fight relentlessly. He tells the truth, keeps his word, helps those in need, and speaks out against injustice. A lawful good character hates to see the guilty go unpunished. Lawful good is the best alignment you can be because it combines honor and compassion. However, lawful good can be a dangerous alignment because it restricts freedom and criminalizes self-interest. Race: Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, spo...

p.s. This is my 500th post this year.

How Regularly Does This Happen? The last time I urinated on myself was in 2006. It was three years ago almost to the day. I remember it very well, because, urinating on one's self is a very memorable event. I was standing in my Raintree apartment in Provo, UT wearing my charcoal three-piece, pin-striped suit. The events which led up to the mishap are foggy. My thought immediately preceding the indecent was how extraordinarily long and low-set my zipper was on my trousers. The next thing I knew, my "firefighters" let go of "the hose" and it went zipping around the inside my pants. Fortunately, it was the end of the night, so I didn't have to explain to my date why I had to switch suits. Flash-forward to 2009! Yesterday, I was standing up using the toilet in my Oakridge apartment in Logan, UT, minding my own business. When all of a sudden, my free hand casually moves in front of my golden stream. Splash! Trickle, Drip, Drip, Drip! I was wet. ...

Honestly, does this Sea of Red make any one else feel uncomfortable? The whole scene exudes an imminent feeling of macabre. First the eerie stillness. Then, a sudden commotion. It's weird. HURRY! You only have 6 hours left to celebrate before it's too late. Let's show em how we do it in the U.S. of A. Hug your favorite red-head!

A recent study has been done to study the correlation between eating and sleeping. The following article might be particularly interesting especially for those coping with jet lag, stereotypical college students and LDS bishops. “ Not eating for 12-16 hours can help people quickly reset their sleep-wake cycle, according to a study from the Harvard Medical School. This discovery can drastically improve a person’s ability to cope with jet lag or adjust to working late shifts. Scientists have long known that our circadian rhythm is regulated by our exposure to light. Now they have found a second “food clock” that takes over when we are hungry. This mechanism probably evolved to make sure starving mammals don’t go to sleep when they should be foraging for food… It usually takes people a week to fully adjust to a new time zone or sleeping schedule. To think that this new “food clock” hack can help you change your internal clock in one day is mind boggling.”

President Obama addressed students today at 10am across the nation, grades k-12. His "back to school" speech focused on the importance of taking personal responsibility for learning. Many of Obama's points relate to the discussion my learning theory class which ended last week. Last week, we all took that test that defined what type of learner we each were. I feel that, like my Learning Theory professor, Joanne, President Obama is encouraging us to become a nation of intentional [transforming] learners. Intentional Learners take responsibility for and control of their own learning. They learn best in loosely structured environments that encourage and support positive anticipations, expertise building, risk-taking experiences, mentoring relationships, self-directed learning, problem-solving situations, support for high learner control opportunities, transformative processes, high learning standards, and achievement of challenging personal goals for long-term accomplis...

1. Mother of Mullets 2. The Dad is sporting a decent mullet, but the kid's is phenomenal! Business in the front... Party in the back! 3. The Neo-Mullet-hawk 4. Can you see the beast lurking in the shadows? No, I'm not referring to the bull. 5. The natural look.

Tim Hawkins shows off his voice talent in "The Government Can," a parody of Gene Wilder's, "The Candy Man." See more of Tim's videos at http://www.timhawkins.net

Despite the anti-American slur, I believe the following statistic to be veracious: If you want to know the answer, the image solution lies below: Hint #1: The answer is greater than thirty, but less that one hundred. Hint #2: Don't forget to count the triangles whose angles start from the bottom left, the bottom right and the center, where the lines from the left and right meet. Hint #3: Only equation to solve for the answer is (n+1)^3 where n is the number of internal lines coming from each side. Hint #4: Another way of looking at it is 4x4x4, so they say. I'm sure it's a little more complex than that. Solution: Want to see how it's done?

One Good Man In theaters: October 9, 2009 "Aaron Young is a good man. But even good men can be put to the test. Just when it seems his life can’t get more complicated, it does. Pressures with his job are reaching the breaking point, one daughter is struggling to find herself, and another has found a fiancé—complete with future in-laws who are anything but supportive. To top it all off, Aaron has been called to be the bishop of his ward. At this pivotal point in his life, Aaron wonders if anything he does helps the people closest to him. A warm and deeply moving film about the choices and complications of everyday life, ONE GOOD MAN is the story of an unsung hero trying to do the right thing, regardless of the consequences." apple.com/trailers/independent/onegoodman/

Let's talk about racism. Webster's Online Dictionary defines " racism " as, "Discrimination or prejudice based on race." I think everyone is racist to a degree. For example, I'm racist. However, I feel a lot less racist here in Utah than I did when I lived in the Northwest. You know what I'm saying? (I'm saying that I think Utahans are much more racist and fearful of diverse political views than Washingtonians.) Why? Closed-mindedness is a natural consequence of a rigid LDS dogma that warns against any teaching that could be interpreted as contradictory to the teachings of the Prophet and President of the Church. I agree that it is important to avoid messages that are known to be "evil." The Prophet has identified some of these specific messages in the For the Strength of the Youth Booklet "Whatever you read, listen to, or look at has an effect on you. Therefore, choose only entertainment and media that uplift you...

You know it's a joke, but still, the images evoke fear. Interesting. 1. what does that say about you? 2. what does that say about President Obama? 3. what does that say about these images? 4. what does that say about U.S. media today? 5. what does that say about the future of this country? I am currently unaffiliated with any political party. Up to this point, I have supported many of President Obama's politics. But that does not mean that I am not watchful. When it comes to politics, my philosophy is to get behind principles and not individuals. I'll tell you what I'm nervous about. Regardless of ethnicity or party politics, I am afraid that the country is rallying behind a single man to solve all of our problems. The current platforms are bailout economics, health care reform and general allegiance to "the president." I'm keeping a careful eye on President Obama's up and coming addresses for hints of socialist propaganda. So ...

WEAR YOUR TEAM LOGO AND GET A FREE CHICK-FIL-A CHICKEN SANDWICH! MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 7 Click here for the official website. Wear your team logo to any Chick-fil-A nationwide this Labor Day and get a FREE Chick-fil-A Original Chicken Sandwich! Valid at any Chick-fil-A location from 10:30 AM until close.

Friday was hot--perfect weather for a Jello Slide on the USU Quad. We were invited to participate in the campus wide activity immediately following an institute address by emeritus general authority W. Rolf Kerr, on going beyond the call. You can imagine, people were pretty pumped up to go out of their comfort zones. Now, take a minute and imagine what a jello slide might look like. I pictured something way different than what it really was. Basically, the organizers filled large garbage cans with jello and chilled them in a commercial walk-in refrigerator. Once they were close to solid, the garbage cans were emptied into a large, inflatable pool. Next to the pool was a giant strip of industrial plastic that was staked and watered down. Participants first wet themselves in the tub of jello and then run and hit the slide. Most people slid 70 feet, easily. The rest of us stood around eating Grape and Tiger's Blood snow cones, trying not to get splashed by jello. He...