Tuesdays with Muerte

Sometimes, when I have my camera handy, I'll take pictures of delicious and healthy dinners I've cooked as evidence. Sometimes, I feel it necessary to prove to my parents that I'm eating well. Baked chicken with my own glaze concoction [A1 sauce, Cheepo-brand Hickory Smoke, A-secret-that-is-not-chocolate] Curried rice with steamed carrots. My mom's baked salmon recipe with a lemon pepper/olive oil/lemon juice glaze. Served with al dente carrots and scalloped potatoes.

On his official website, Jay labels himself a "NYC-based singer-songwriter and antisocial misanthropist not-so-extraordinaire" . I haven't talked with him about his history yet (I'm still waiting for his email response), but he sings about his very troubled youth. My guess is that he was severely discriminated against as a homosexual in Texas. He moved to NYC to replace all the labels and the hate with acceptance in the big city. Who wouldn't want that? Below is a music video of one of Jay's songs that I heard before knowing anything about him. I immediately loved the enchanting emotion behind it. And the folk melody is soothing to the ear. Only while listening recently did I catch the gay-themed pronoun, " he'd be here with flowers if I lived in AZ." Does it bother me? No, like Jay, when I hear a love song, I don't associate or assign love within specific genders. Even as a Conservative, Republican, Christian, heterosexual, I se...

In case you were wondering where it was, here it is: 146 West 600 South Provo, UT

Favorites? * Here are some more winners from GLENNZ. *Previous "Simple Solid" post: First one.

"If you had to say you hated someone, who would it be?" This is was a real question asked of an Education Week class I attended last year. "Just let your mind relax into it; surely someone's name or image will come to your minds." There was a point to that exercise, but I'm just going to leave it at that and dwell on the fact that of all the people I've met IN MY LIFE, the only person that I could possibly fit into the "hate" category would be a former roommate of mine. An "EX-roomie", if you will. There were times during my stint with him that I would hide in my room because I couldn't stand being in his presence; I was worried that exposure to the cloud of gloom and pessimism that surrounded him would overcome me and I would slit my own wrists. Who knew that my roommates would have such influence over me? I am Seriously, So Blessed to have had terrific roommates my entire Provo career. Some were obviously better ...

Actually, you all did it; not me. Thanks to your patronage, my blog boasts an average of 1000 visitors/month for two months in a row now. Congratulations! Now, let me know what you'd like to see more of. Since the day I went public with Tuesdays With Muerte , I have only received three bits of feedback from viewers on what they would like me to blog about: 1. Something featuring them. 2. More human interest posts (my thoughts on real stuff going on in my life). 3. Less nasty internet pictures (except for the good ones). I made the blog public because I am desperate for attention. I am trying to figure out how to connect with people. For example, I sense that some of my posts may be too long for people to read and want to respond. Also, I feel like I post too frequently for viewers to keep up. I'd love your feedback. [Did you catch the Robin Hood quote in the title?] ---------------- Listening to: Snow Patrol - Limited Edition

As co-committee chair of the Elder's Quorum Perfecting the Saints Committee, I was charged with the responsibility to motivate 15 other committee members to care for the welfare of everyone else in the quorum. The love required to complete this task comes from prayer. As we learn in Moroni 7:48, the desire to serve is derived from praying for that desire with all the energy of one's heart. So, I decided to come up with a clever way to get my guys to pray. Actually, the idea wasn't original at all; I feel like my situation applies it better than most. I dug up the tired token of "THE PRAYER ROCK". Here's the metaphor: Each of us are the brother of Jared. When we desire to answer the question of how to sail the Elders of this ward to safety, we must approach the Lord in prayer and ask him to illuminate our stone (the stone that each of the 16 of us have in our rooms that I hand-painted to appear white.) These stones remind us that although we may not...

I was alone in my apartment this morning. While singing in the shower, I choked on my own saliva. After successfully coughing through the episode, I wondered— Q: What exactly I would had done, had I needed to perform the Heimlich on myself. A: I would probably rush to the kitchen where I would use the counter-top or the sofa arm in the other room. If that failed, I mused on how interesting it would be for my roommate, Reed, and his girlfriend, Natalie, to enter the apartment and find my naked, wet body unconscious on the floor of the front room. Then, I ever-so-briefly considered the hilarious prank of playing possum. I immediately forced the thought out of my head when I realized that this possible future would inevitably end with Reed's lips around my own. Sorry. TMI [Too Much Information].

What is the true story surrounding this recent picture? (You might be SURPRISED!) You have a 33.333333% of getting the right answer from the three choices below. Doesn't that kid look like Bubba Tracy? A. Christian Easter Week Celebration?   Penitents take part in the procession of "La Paz" brotherhood during Holy Week in the Andalusian capital of Seville, southern Spain, April 5, 2009 B. A True KKK Rally?   Ku Klux Klan procession, Portland, ME. The Klan's Maine director, F. Eugene "Doc" Farnsworth, spoke against Catholics, Jews and immigrants. C.  Pageant depicting how the Klan was back in 1923?   Five-day historical drama with a cast of 200, entitled "The Truth about the Klan", showing in Statesboro, GA, April 28-May 2. p.s Even though Wikipedia suggests that the KKK was created by "six middle-class Confederate veterans from Pulaski, Tennessee on December 24, 1865, in the immediate aftermath of the American Civil War", n...

You may recall a previous post with Simple Solids T-shirts on it. Well, here's more: There's more where this came from. Count on it!

What is  The Ganzfeld Proceedure? ( Wikipedia )  Basically, it uses sensory deprivation to get the mind to hallucinate. I decided to give the experiment a try.  Now, ideally, the procedure requires two halves of a ping pong ball and headphones, but I used taped-over goggles instead. I should have cut open one of my two ping pong balls I have lying around, but I couldn't bring myself to do it; what if one of them broke and I needed the other to challenge someone to a game? (Ping pong is obviously a high priority in my life right now.  Master Chen and I are really working hard in the evenings.) In addition to the darkened goggles, I set my radio to static and laid down on my bed. Everything was dark. Even though the radio static was blaringly loud, after about 3 or 4 minutes, the radio would seem to auto-correct itself and I would begin to pick out songs and an announcers voice through the static. When that happened, I would adjust the dial to random static again...

The origin of the  Slow Clap Epic High Five between Dr. McNinja and his Gorilla/Receptionist Judy Dr. McNinja like to give high-fives to animals; especially ones that he is hallucinating about due to severe blood loss. Dr. McNinja dramatically rides Robo Dracula from the moon Dan McNinja trains his son, Dark-Cloud-Puncher, and Gordito how to defend against the KNIFE EYE ATTACK! Mitzi McNinja trains the boys to guard themselves against mind imprisonment Benjamin Franklin leads a band of zombified US Presidents in the Thriller dance during one of Dr. McNinja's nightmares. Velociraptors! Heck Yeah! I recommend this  review website , which offers a bio on each of the characters and a paragraph synopsis on each of the 10 full issues.

Srsly? What are these things? If you have any information regarding the identification of this tool found in the deepest cupboard of my kitchen, please contact me via the comments box below.

April 23rd was the 445th anniversary of the birth of William Shakespeare . In honor of this occasion, Talk Like Shakespeare Day is celebrated annually. Unfortunately, I seem to always be a few days late on finding that stuff out. If your memories are good enough, here are some ways to celebrate in the future: 1. Instead of you, say thou. Instead of y’all, say thee. 2. Rhymed couplets are all the rage. 3. Men are Sirrah, ladies are Mistress, and your friends are all called Cousin. 4. Instead of cursing, try calling your tormentors jackanapes or canker-blossoms or poisonous bunch-back’d toads. 5. Don’t waste time saying "it," just use the letter "t" (’tis, t’will, I’ll do’t). 6. Verse for lovers, prose for ruffians, songs for clowns. 7. When in doubt, add the letters "eth" to the end of verbs (he runneth, he trippeth, he falleth). 8. To add weight to your opinions, try starting them with methinks, mayhaps, in sooth or wherefore. 9. When wooing la...

You guys have to at least check this out: The Adventures of Dr. McNinja™ It is difficult to recommend any one comic issue. Issues 0-3 are stand-alone episodes and offer terrific back story. The trouble is that the issues get better as time goes on. 0 - Dr. McNinja Vs. McDonalds 1 - Meet The Doctor And His Friendly Staff 2 - So What Is A McNinja? 3 - There Is A Raptor In My Office By the time you read this, there will probably be MANY MORE! Overall, this is not a life-changing comic but I get at least 2 or 3 hearty guffaws out of each issue.  We'll see what you think. Merchandise : *Over-training to fight one of the seven wizard ghosts; KNIFE EYE ATTACK! T-shirt. *Dr. McNinja's Sidekick, Gordito--a 12-year-old boy who grew a mustache through pure willpower, riding his pet velocraptor, Yoshi T-Shirt. *Zombie Founding Fathers doing the Thriller Dance to freak out Dr. McNinja T-shirt. *(Not shown in comics--believe me--I checked) Dr. McNinja's Gori...

This is a picture of me and my ninja Brother, Patrick (that is his Americanized name) after a long week of EFY counseling up in Tacoma, WA in 2007. That entire week, we enforced the curfew with our stealth, cunning and magnificent displays of authority. Once everyone was tucked in for an hour or so, we would dress all in black and slink around the guys dorms listening at windows and under doors. I remember hiding motionless in a bush for more that a half and hour at a time. More than once we foiled plots of those wishing to escape their rooms. On the last night of the week, we recruited helpers to gather intel while we administered order and obedience among the more disorderly youth. My favorite moment of ninjaing around was when we were stalking a multiple floor breakout and I cartwheeled across one end of a dorm hallway undetected while a group of would-be-hoodlums gathered at the other end. I jumped out at them with my crazy eyes and chased them down to the next floor where Patri...

*Link to this original comic page. We meet again, Blog Follower!  Have you returned to educate yourself on recent internet phenomena?   Well, you are in for a pleasant treat.  It just so happens that I discovered the source of an enduring internet meme in a webcomic series that I have unknowingly been following The Adventures of Dr. McNinja™ for over a year now. Some time last year, I saw a funny t-shirt and decided to save the image (as I do with most t-shirts I come across). Then someone made a parody of it. And another, and another, etc., until it became a MEME! Here, for your viewing pleasure, is the genesis of that image and its offspring over the last 13 months: In the following issue of Dr. McNinja, Frans Rayner, an evil, Danish martial arts film star who nearly exterminated all ninja in the 80's single-handedly, created a drug that heightened the average person's abilities and strength to that of a ninja so that he would be able to track down the remai...