The Research For decades, researchers believed that monitoring—keeping close tabs on where teens are, who they're with, and what they're doing—was the key to keeping them out of trouble. It seemed like a "silver bullet" for reducing risky behavior. But it turns out, kids are REALLY good at avoiding monitoring. They know how to hide things, dodge questions, and stay just out of sight when they want to. So, if parents rely on monitoring alone, they’re not actually learning much about what’s really going on. Instead, 2010 research shows that what actually matters is parental knowledge—but most of that knowledge doesn’t come from spying or strict rules. In fact, only 5% of what parents know comes from monitoring. A much bigger chunk—50%—comes from kids willingly sharing information (disclosure). So how do parents encourage their kids to open up? Two big factors make a difference: How the child is feeling that day – If they're in a good mood, they’re more likely to ta...
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