Tuesdays with Muerte

Here are some jobs I have pursued in the last 2 days. I haven't received replies from either source since I sent them emails requesting more information: 1. A Chiropractic Tech in Orem. The job description includes helping stick needles in people! 2. A Model for an upstanding academy of art: The Bridge Academy in Provo. Here are some jobs I wouldn't enjoy Handyman Police force anywhere but in America Large Animal Vertranarian Overworked... Seriously overworked...

This looks like something that my family would do. A nationwide improv association in New York welcome home a complete stranger at JFK. Here is the article  about it.

I hate getting sick. This cold came on fast. I felt the germs coming on Tuesday morning and by Wednesday afternoon they were in full swing. We'll see how long the little bugger will last. I feel like I've been drained of all my bodily liquids. This means no donating plasma for a while. (FYI, sold plasma is used as active ingredients in expensive lotions and shampoos. It also has a shelf life of a decade.) What I should have tried: Flu Shot Airbourn Tablets Not playing Ultimate Frisbee Tuesday night Due to unpopular demand, I have replaced the graphic sniveling "cold" picture with this new censored version. If you have any "motherly" advice for me over the next few days or to prevent common colds in the future, please leave me your comments below. Thanks. ---------------- Listening to: Mandarin Foundation Disc 1 - Track 06

Last month, my old set of BOSE broke. I ripped the male head out of my computer on accident and damaged the wiring to the left headphone. I IMMEDIATELY called up customer service and they agreed to replace my broken pair for only $60. I wanted to upgrade, but it was too expensive. I sent in the broken headphone UPS and they would deliver me my new pair in 2-3 days. However, it one month later, and still no headphones. So I call them up all disgruntled and discover that it was their fault that I was never contacted that they couldn't process my credit card. I then asked to speak to a manager, Tom. I felt kind of soccer momish, but I worked my MTC referral center magic on him and ended up upgrading my headphones and getting next day shipping as a cherry on top. Lesson of the day: Ask to speak to the supervisor. **My last pair of headphones were these: Around the Ear Triports . This is a $40 upgrade for me and I get to try an on-the-ear experience this time, meaning...

1000 Awesome Things - This is definitely some male's attempt at finding reasons to be grateful in life. He's still only on 910 last I checked, but that is still quite impressive. My favorite is the smell of a freshly opened can of tennis balls. Woman blind 3 days out of the week ( News Story ). I thought this would be a fascinating beginning to a, "Would you rather..." question. Any ideas on finishing it? I would say, "either no sight for 3 days or no smell/touch?" 21 ways to ZEN out your life - I tried number 8 and it was really hard for me. I desperately wanted a pudding snack pack. (Read more to find out...) What do you want to do before you die? - Have you ever wondered what people would say if you asked 1000 of them? Well here is a sample of their responses. Sticky Note Origami - This one is for Belle. I know that the equation: (Bored + Office Supplies) x AWESOME = Sticky Note Origami.

I think I like this ad mostly because it is in Spanish. ---------------- Listening to: Mark Mothersbaugh - Nick & Norah's Theme

When I drove the shuttle van for Mark Harmon's Auto Center, I found this charming neighborhood that I thought Mom and Dad might have been interested in buying. It was off of State Street in Lindon, past some fruit orchards and up a slight hill offering a beautiful view of Utah Lake. I snapped this photo with my phone out the window of the shuttle van. I found out from my passenger that the ward was full of recent empty-nesters. The average house price (back then) was around $400,000. However, since you guys decided against Utah, I didn't bother sending the picture to you. What do you all think? Worth checking out?

While searching Craigslist for Provo jobs, I came across a "barter" posting for chiropractic work. The deal was---I give Dr. Moore 3 canned goods and he gives me a free consultation. I went to Dr. Moore twice this last week, once to take measurements and to capture some x-rays of my neck and hips. The next visit was to review the xrays and watch an "instructional" video to cast the fear of God into my bones so that I would fork out $35 for a two-minute adjustment. Here are some of the phone photos of the xrays: My neck is supposed to follow the green line. From the side, my ears are supposed to be directly over my shoulders. This dotted line is what my neck is actually doing. It's a phase one sublocution. That just means there is slight misalignment, but no significant trauma. Imagine the weight of a bowling ball carefully balanced on your head by a system of neck, shoulder, and back muscles. Since I learned that, I imagine that my head reall...

As soon as I recieved my coupon I was looking for opportunities to got claim my Inteli-Gel seat cushion at the My Comfort store in the University Mall. At first I thought it would be a good idea to go mattress shopping for a date. We could go to the mall and go ring shopping first. Walk out with an $8 cubic zirconia and pretend to be in the market for a mattress together. Then I thought, the only person willing to spend time doing that with me would be my real fiancé/wife. So I braved it alone. It was a beast trying to find it. Even the info lady sent me on a goose chase. I walked all through the Mall trying to find the entrance. It wasn't until I asked a REALLY OLD concierge-looking info desk lady that I discovered that store could only be accessed from the outside. 20 minutes from the time I began my search, I walked through the doors to catch my would-be salesman telling his co-worker some kind of lude story involving hip-thrusts. I walked right up to him and to...