Tuesdays with Muerte

I'm Okay! Here's a great story about a drunk guy I met serendipitously outside of my apartment. The guy pictured above actually looks a lot like the guy I met tonight. THIS IS IN PROVO, MIND YOU! While you read this story, consider what you would have done had you been in my place: THE STORY OF JUSTIN I met a man named Justin in one of the boys buildings at Carriage Cove as he fell halfway down the stairs on his bike. "Do you live here?" I asked. Justin lit up a cigarette and took a long, interrupted drag. "No. I'm looking for Sara's house." Justin fell down again. "Whoa! That's steep." He then proceeded to tell me how he was dropped off here by "his friends" who didn't want him around anymore because he was gay. "Do you hate gays?" He asked me, breaking from his story (and obviously in search of new friends). He continued to explain in detail some of his sexual fantasies before I stopped h...

Special thanks to my good friends Ryan Tripp, Brian Zundel, David Cox, Mike Zimmerman for helping to create and christen Provo's NEWEST urban frisbee golf course. In fare weather, it takes about an hour each to play, both, the front and back nine holes of the course. We took special measures to design a course that would protect cars and swimmers from stray throws. We hope you enjoy it. Rules Order of Tee is decided by the lowest score on the previous hole. If the insides of apartments used in the holes are not available, just use their doormat. When throwing, throw from behind where your frisbee landed with respect to the direction you are about to throw it next. Your frisbee must be thrown from a controlled position; no jumping or leaning against objects. Out of Bounds (OB) is an automatic 1 stroke penalty and dropped perpendicular to the line of sight the hole on either side of you. Roof, sand, foreign balconies and the inside of the pool fence are all OB. If yo...

Long story short, Stef misplaced Scott's $500 glasses. Stef also needed to take the garbage out before cleaning checks in the morning. I volunteered to get my hands dirty and carefully sift through each garbage bag, piece by piece, as I poured them into the complex's dumpster at 2:10am this morning. I had Stef's headlamp on so that I could see in the dark. Out of the blue a girl walks up to the dumpster with her own trash. I was too tired to react with any emotion. All I could manage to say was, "Hi. Would you mind throwing yours towards the back for me?" Looking at her heavy bags, I realized how rude that sounded so I helped her by throwing them in for her. "Goodnight" I said, and went back to sifting. It was then, as she was just walking out of sight, that I realized she walking pretty fast toward her apartment and I looked like some creepy pervert at an all girls apartment complex dumpster--I've probably got less than 5 before a poli...

Before you watch this, know that this video MUST have been doctored. Just enjoy the ridiculous humor. Again, the last part of this video is not real. Don't worry about it.

First thing you need to know is that I'm on a new and improved sleeping schedule. I try to be asleep by midnight and up by 8am every day. Instead of setting a "bed time" goal for myself, I've set a "wake up time" which dictates when I choose to go to bed. If I go to bed super-late, I'll suffer in the morning. My only challenge with this new plan is that I still don't have a job or classes to get up for in the mornings. So far, I've spent my time going to the temple, giving plasma, taking walks and blogging. To make sure I follow through with this plan, I've built into my sleeping habits an "insurance policy." I usually wake up about three times before I actually get out of bed. Each time I wake up, I leave one of my limbs outside of the covers. By 8am, all of my extremities are exposed to the cool morning air and I'm ready to get out of bed.

I was pretty astounded when I first say these pictures. Then I saw this dude's thumb And I thought, "that dog would never stay in the bun" So I tried to replicate the effect: Scissors—Not quite high enough Febreze aerosol spray