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The Elevator Debacle at the Church Office Building

Pope is a good friend of mine; he's my best friend at work. We eat lunch together regularly in the company cafeteria to discuss work-related stuff and check in with one another generally. It's wonderful having someone with whom I can be completely open with.  However, I'm afraid it was that same closeness that caused the following debacle...

One week, Pope was suffering some weird respiratory symptoms—labored breathing followed by wheezing (like a subtle Darth Vader).  After a day or two of this, we both got used to Pope's condition.

After lunch one day later in the week, Pope invited me up to his office to look at some of his work.  We hoped into one of the six elevators along with a lovely senior missionary couple.

Between floors three and four I very innocently asked Pope about his raspy breathing (not giving thought to our fellow passengers).  "How's that respiratory disease?" I inquired.  The poor missionary couple was petrified.  They conspicuously crowded to far side of the elevator, praying for the moment they could get off.  I think they were holding their breaths too.


Observing the effect my question had on them, I panicked.  Floor 6...7...8. "Ding!"  The elevator doors to their floor opened.  In a ditch effort to assuage the situation, I tried lighten the mood with a parting joke. As they both lurched for the exit, I leaned my my neck out after them and coughed in my raspiest voice "GOOD-BYE!" The sister missionary squeaked and leaped forward, covering her mouth with her hand, as if I had just goosed her.

The doors shut behind them and relaxed back onto the rails of the elevator.  I had honestly thought that my innocuous joke had redeemed my previous lack of forethought—that is until Pope, wide-eyed in disbelief, busted up laughing.  Only then did I realize that I most likely permanently traumatized that poor missionary couple.

We were bent over laughing the rest of the way up to Pope's floor and proceeded to laugh for 3-5 minutes upon exiting the elevator.  There wasn't enough air on the floor to meet the demand our lungs required of us.  What had I done!  It wouldn't have been funny at all had I committed the act intentionally.  The humor of it came from knowing how thoughtless and surreal the situation had been.

Incidentally, the next day, the entire Church workforce received an email reminder of appropriate decorum at work.  I'm sure it was purely coincidental.

It's been 6 months since The Elevator Incident, and Pope still can't get into an elevator with me without sniggering at the memory of that event.

Comments

  1. Ha ha, that's awesome. Sounds like it's right out of "Ghost." I especially thought the part about the Church's statement was ironically funny.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's funny that I read this post right after reading this.

    http://www.theonion.com/articles/report-its-not-okay-to-just-start-talking-to-peopl,29610/?ref=auto

    ReplyDelete

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