I am tired. My sleep rhythms are messed up. But maybe I can make the most of it.
Here's what's been going through my mind:
--I was pretty shocked when I found out that firefighters pull 24 hour shifts. I had always told myself that I could never be a doctor for that very reason. Then since my interview, I have had the most difficult time fall asleep at nights. Maybe my body was just trying to prove to me that I could do it?
--To assuage the restless nights last week, I would find myself at the gym at 2am to swim and run and lift weights. (I didn't like that one bit because all the weirdos come out that late. But what alternative did I have? I would just lie in bed, listen to my Ipod, watch a movie. I tried not to use my computer since I was the only one up.)
--This week, I have shifted to 5am gym. I'll stay up until my last roommate goes to bed at 3am and then just lie in bed. I noticed, from the sounds coming from upstairs, that Nate Reese stays up all night too. Maybe we can do something productive together.
--The last two nights, I haven't slept. I do take naps from 8am-11am/12pm in the afternoon though. I got a little tired this evening after dinner, but instead of taking another nap I'm trying to stay awake until midnight to see if I can get back on track. I'm worried though because I'm not tired any more.
--I've read all my books. I just finished, "how to win friends and influence people." My purpose for reading that was to figure out a way for Hunter to be more socially responsible with his belongings around the apartment (dishes, clothes, food, entertainment, sports equipment, etc.) BTW, he and I had a run in today. I asked him if he would take some of his things off the "communal" kitchen table. He called me a jerk, dramatically threw his stuff back in his room and stormed out. All this in the presence of Brian Spencer and Lee. I couldn't believe someone who works at the MTC could have so little control over his emotions, not to mention communication skills. Our encounter made me feel like I wasn't a good communicator. I don't know if our relationship will mend before I leave in 40 days. The way to his heart is love and appreciate him like the "Mars and Venus" guy says, but I don't feel like being his mother. I'm not even sure if I have the strength to summon up any Christ-like attributes for our situation. It will require a lot of prayer and maybe some extra visits to the temple.
--Well, overall, I feel healthy, which is weird. I'm eating well--4 solid and diverse meals a day. (Yesterday was admittedly unbalanced--4 different kinds of pasta.)
--My roommates are all aware of my situation and are supportive. Jon, the American-Asian, agreed to keep me company for as long as he could; he only has one class and usually stays up the latest anyway.
Here's what's been going through my mind:
--I was pretty shocked when I found out that firefighters pull 24 hour shifts. I had always told myself that I could never be a doctor for that very reason. Then since my interview, I have had the most difficult time fall asleep at nights. Maybe my body was just trying to prove to me that I could do it?
--To assuage the restless nights last week, I would find myself at the gym at 2am to swim and run and lift weights. (I didn't like that one bit because all the weirdos come out that late. But what alternative did I have? I would just lie in bed, listen to my Ipod, watch a movie. I tried not to use my computer since I was the only one up.)
--This week, I have shifted to 5am gym. I'll stay up until my last roommate goes to bed at 3am and then just lie in bed. I noticed, from the sounds coming from upstairs, that Nate Reese stays up all night too. Maybe we can do something productive together.
--The last two nights, I haven't slept. I do take naps from 8am-11am/12pm in the afternoon though. I got a little tired this evening after dinner, but instead of taking another nap I'm trying to stay awake until midnight to see if I can get back on track. I'm worried though because I'm not tired any more.
--I've read all my books. I just finished, "how to win friends and influence people." My purpose for reading that was to figure out a way for Hunter to be more socially responsible with his belongings around the apartment (dishes, clothes, food, entertainment, sports equipment, etc.) BTW, he and I had a run in today. I asked him if he would take some of his things off the "communal" kitchen table. He called me a jerk, dramatically threw his stuff back in his room and stormed out. All this in the presence of Brian Spencer and Lee. I couldn't believe someone who works at the MTC could have so little control over his emotions, not to mention communication skills. Our encounter made me feel like I wasn't a good communicator. I don't know if our relationship will mend before I leave in 40 days. The way to his heart is love and appreciate him like the "Mars and Venus" guy says, but I don't feel like being his mother. I'm not even sure if I have the strength to summon up any Christ-like attributes for our situation. It will require a lot of prayer and maybe some extra visits to the temple.
--Well, overall, I feel healthy, which is weird. I'm eating well--4 solid and diverse meals a day. (Yesterday was admittedly unbalanced--4 different kinds of pasta.)
--My roommates are all aware of my situation and are supportive. Jon, the American-Asian, agreed to keep me company for as long as he could; he only has one class and usually stays up the latest anyway.
Bryan, that sounds awful! I'm sorry you've been having such weird sleep lately, you and mom both. So what is this about "interview?" Try checking some books out from the library (or books on tape--> ipod, you can listen to them until you fall asleep) Sorry your roommate thinks you're a jerk. You're not. Nice baby pics.
ReplyDeleteOh, I am so sorry you are having trouble sleeping - that's the pits. At least you're feeling healthy.
ReplyDeleteAlso, bummer about Hunter. Only 40 more days. Good luck. That fat boy picture is just so sad.
Love you, H
I can sure relate to you on the sleep orleal. I have made a serious study of sleep on the internet and have made a list of all I learned which I will send. Maybe just one or two of the things will turn out to be helpful for you. The big thing that it can be is a severe lack of vitamin D. Lyn Albrecht is receiving an injection every month when her blood showed she was very low and now it's much much better. We all need a certain amount of light and sunshine and I know I'm not getting enough. The good thing is when your body is tired enough, it will take the sleep it needs! The only sure fire thing that helps me is TV or music-changing the busy brainwaves to focus on something else puts them into a sleep pattern.
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